a close friend sent me this text, "i'm so sorry that when you woke up this morning it was all still true. we are praying for you." it did feel like, at least for a minute, that everything was back to normal and i felt whole again. then the disbelief and ache and yearning came back. it's been a hard 48 hours. it seems that at any moment the door will open and there will be my dad and my brother and this will all have been a big mistake.
i finally got home to my parent's house late sat night and since then it has been a roller coaster. it is great to be home with my mom and sister and sister-in-law. there is such strength in families! and we have had so many visits and calls from friends and neighbors and family. each one brings a new set of tears, new pain, and new healing. it's been a day of hi's and lo's. we have laughed and cried and everything inbetween. a reporter and photographer from the Deseret News came down from salt lake and we got to visit with them for over an hour about my dad and dallin. they were looking for more information and stories about who they were and what they were like as people. it was so fun to sit and recollect and talk about these two men that we love and miss so much!
today i saw glimpses of pain so bad it just tore my heart in two; i have also seen glimpses that have reassured me that everything will be ok. i don't know why this had to happen to my family, or why we had to lose two members we loved, but i know that we are not given trials in this life that we can't handle. so we will make it through, persevere, and live lives that will enable us to be together again.
thank you for all the kind messages of love and support. it means so much to me and my family!
8/25/2008
Hard
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8 comments:
Oh Marie, our prayers are still with you. You are so strong, and it's okay to cry...you are such a sweet girl with your words and thoughts in these hard times you are a strength to us all. Just remember in those quiet moments to come when you are by yourself at home that you are so deeply loved by our Father in Heaven, and that He knows your pain. Hugs, girl.
Marie, I want you to know that you are in my prayers. I emailed Jen Bird after I read your post this morning. I don't know if you know but her dad was killed in a plane crash several years ago after leaving Provo from visiting her and flying back to Washington. You are amazing to find the strength in the gospel. That truely is the only way! Know that you are loved and that you are being watched over and that he has already felt your pain. When you feel you can let him take that pain from you! The atonement is amazing! Love you! Cortney (Broadbent) Alvord
Marie,
I would love to take photographs for you guys! Let me know what time and when! Hang in there! My thoughts are still with you!
435-590-5470
Jaelyn
Marie,
We are praying for you and your mom and Christopher and Hannah and Kamber and her baby. I think the WORLD of your family. The peace that comes from our Savior is real, and I hope you will feel his love in your life, especially right now.
Marie,
You are in our hearts and prayers. I have found a lot of comfort in your words, though it seems strange; I should be consoling you. Please know how much your dad and brother meant to the Jordan family. Your dad was always such a delight to see, even when he was cutting on us! He always made the visit and the procedure almost fun. He extended numerous kindnesses to our family over the years. Those gestures will never be forgotten. Dallin was a bundle of wisdom and joy. His engagement picture hangs on my bulletin board in my classroom. He will never be forgotten! Please know our hearts are hurting at their loss and for you and your family. Hugs and kisses to you, Marie. Love, Mrs. J
I am crying with you right now as I am reading this. What amazing strength and comfort the gospel brings and I am so grateful that you are able to be with your family at this time. I know that your father and brother love you so much and can't wait to see you again! What a simple yet amazing blessing that we have been given-Eternal Families!! And I am truly strengthened by your strength and strong testimony. I truly felt the spirit and of your strength as I read these 2 posts. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time and if there is ANYTHING that you need from me, please let me know....even if it is praying double time or fasting for you and/or your family!!!
You know I don't have the words to say, so I'll just stick with these simple truths:
You are amazing and I love you.
Marie, we just wanted to let you know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. We are so sorry about what has happened. Your testimony and strength are amazing. Love, Maegan and Doug Corry
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